As a loyal pop culture and food enthusiast, I’ve always found Bob Belcher’s burger names deeply scintillating. Bob runs a dingy burger spot on TV’s outstanding Bob’s Burgers (available on Netflix, if you have a few days free for binging), and punny burger specials is sort of his thing. Thankfully, internet chef Cole Bowden has dedicated a large amount of time to curating a blog in which he crafts all of the named burgers from the show. Better yet, he’s publishing a book compiling the best of the bunch! To vent a little of my excitement, I’ve compiled the most mouth watering and inspiring cheese-ventions from the show/the blog. Without further ado…
10. Eggers Can’t Be Cheesers Burger (with fried egg and cheese)
Rounding out the top ten is this protein-laden classic. Don’t like American cheese? Well at number 10, eggers can’t be choosers. Bowden lays it down—”One all beef patty topped with American cheese and one fried egg: sunny side up. Served with hot sauce and a piece of lettuce on a plain bun. Comes with nothing, else. I mean, there’s an egg on your burger… what else could you need?”
9. Blue is the Warmest Cheese Burger
I have to admit, I’m not the biggest buffalo sauce fan, but this burger wins my affection with the creamy blue cheese dressing adding that extra dimension of tang that only blue can evoke. From the blog: “An all beef patty marinated in buffalo sauce and stuffed with blue cheese and celery. Served on a sesame seed bun with even more buffalo sauce, and a creamy bleu cheese sauce. Comes with a side of fries and celery.”
8. A Leek of Their Own Burger
“One feta and garlic stuff lamb burger topped with braised leeks and mustard greens and a dollop of potato-leek mustard sauce. Served with a side of potato leek soup.” He had me at feta.
7. Brie to be You and Me Burger
“A Worcestershire seasoned all beef patty topped with caramelized onions and creamy brie on a French roll. Served with sweet baby pickles.” Imagining the flavor pairing of caramelized onions and brie is giving me food-sweats. Let’s move on.
6. National Past-Thyme Burger
The bright white thyme, mint, and dill-flavored chèvre spread will pair nicely on this turkey burger. What is more American than an innovative burger?
5. Baby You Can Chive My Car Burger
Instead of swooning over this feta/chive pairing, let’s focus on the awesome fried pickles that act as the wheels on this miniature car. I’m willing to convert from fries.
4. Bet It All On Black Garlic Burger
Black garlic is very sweet and plays well with the basil and mozzarella on this masterpiece.
3. The Grand Brie Burger
I have no words for the bronze medalist, only the ingredient list: “An all beef patty stuffed with goat brie, laid on a bed of bacon and topped with diced baked apple.”
2. Émile Gorgonzola Burger with J’accusecumbers
This one is from an Archer cross-over episode, but we’ll let it slide. “One all beef patty with a thinly spread layer of creamy gorgonzola, topped with a cucumber and pine nut salad and a tart lemon vinaigrette. Comes on a croissant, because that’s what French people eat. Comes with sliced cucumbers.”
1. Caper Magic To Yourself Burger
This burger pushes inspired right up the the line of insanity, and it works. Featuring a creamy creme fraiche white wine lemon reduction sauce, this burger is, “lemony from the sauce, savory with the basil and garlic, and then the capers take it to the next level.”