The 2016 election is in full swing, and those of us who are still on the fence on who we’ll be voting for have a lot to think about. For instance, whose ideologies are most similar to mine? Who would actually be able to put their plans into effect? Who’s most genuine? Who will understand my love of cheese?
Unfortunately, last nights Republican debate didn’t clear up that last question. We do, however, know where Hillary Clinton stands, as yesterday morning she exclaimed, “I love cheese!”
Hillary Clinton, you know what the people want to hear.
This vital piece of information came from the Twitter of Nick Merrill, Clinton’s traveling press secretary, where he posted a video of Hillary talking to CNN’s Anthony Bourdain backstage at The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. Describing the meal of all meals, she says, “We had about 15 courses of cheese. I mean it was cheese stuffed in things, it was cheese on top of things. It was melted cheese, it was hard cheese. It was unbelievable!”
Hillary’s been given a hard time for not seeming like the kind of person you can just hang out with. Personally, I think I would have plenty to kick back and chat about with someone who openly discusses their love for “cheese-stuffed things.” Not to mention, she is much more savvy with her cheese-talking-points than previous candidates have been.
Take Mitt Romney, who tried relating to voters and talked about things he didn’t understand during his 2012 campaign. When speaking in Mississippi, he added a “y’all” to his speech and told the crowd that he ate “cheesy grits” that morning. Bad move, Romney. As John Birdsall explained in Chowhound, “Though grits in the South often contain cheese, one thing Southerners never do is call them—as Romney did—’cheesy grits.’ They’re ‘cheese grits.’ Always.”
Or John Kerry, who lost points for pretentiousness when he substituted cheese wiz for swiss cheese on his Philly cheesesteak in his 2004 campaign. Come on John Kerry—no one wants a cheese snob in the White House.
Hillary, however, has proved her love of cheese time and time again. During a speech at the 30th anniversary gala for EMILY’s List in March, she couldn’t resist giving a shout out to mac and cheese during her acknowledgment of Senator Barbara Mikulski, who plans on retiring after 2016.
“[Mikulski] understands that, yes, we have to work on macro issues,” Clinton said, “and also macaroni and cheese issues, too.” Macaroni and cheese issues are serious issues, indeed.
I’m hoping the rest of the candidates will announce their views on cheese soon. I like to think that Ben Carson is a secret hoarder of Kraft singles, or that Bernie Sanders snacks exclusively on Mini Babybels. If I find out that one of the candidates and I share a favorite cheese, would that sway my decision? Yes, yes it would.
As we eagerly await for their responses, I have another important question for Hillary: Where did you get this 15-course meal of cheese, and if you become president, will you ensure we all have access to 15-course meals of cheese? Followup question: If Donald Trump is president, will he ensure his face is found on every dairy product out there, or is this woman from Missouri the only person get to bask in the glow of the Dairy Donald?