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Orange is the New Black: It’s Almost Time


In just a few days, Orange is the New Black Season 3 will premiere, and though I am mostly ready for what is to come, I know these last few days are going to test my endurance and physical strength. Like the last .2 miles of a marathon (running, that is), I need to focus, focus, focus to get through to the finish line (a.k.a. Premiere Day).

And what better to focus on? (I’ll pretend you don’t know the answer to this question)—Cheese!

I already set aside my in-binge (think: “in-flight” but no airplane) #OITNB cheese plate, but, it occurs to me I should have something set aside for the long days, weeks, and months that follow this weekend, before Season 4 comes out. (And yes, it is totally reasonable to think about this already).

So—more characters, more cheese!

Sam Healy = Detroit Street Brick

OITNB_healy

Dense, slightly crumbly, and liberally studded with spice—becomes more flavorful and assertive with age.

Joe Caputo = Jarlsberg

OITNB_caputo

Mild, nutty, smooth, slightly sweet with large round eyes. Melts easily and evenly. Versatile.

John Bennett = Fromage Blanc

OITNB_Bennett

Mild, smooth, a little tangy, and low fat. Pairs well with sweet, spicy gingersnaps.

Dayanara Diaz = Harbison

OITNB_daya

Bloomy rind with a protective bark&mdashlwithout the bark, the creamy, custard-like interior would flatten like a pancake.

Gloria Mendoza = Marco Polo Reserve

OITNB_Gloria

Pepper, pepper, pepper. Hint of heat and brightness—rich, nutty, textural complexity.

Janae Watson = Sofia Goat Cheese

OITNB_Janae

Hand molded. Scary looking but sensitive exterior—initially light and lofty, will get fudgier and runnier beneath the surface

Cindy “Black Cindy” Hayes = Cambozola

OITNB_Cindy

Bold, sweet, nutty—can be subtle and sensitive, but mostly just a crowd-pleaser.

Carrie “Big Boo” Black = Coupole

OITNB_BigBoo

Salted, dried, then aged—strong exterior, softer, fluffier interior.

Rosa Cisneros = Meadow Melody Grande

OITNB_rosa

Made with love, aged underground—creamy, buttery, and earthy. Good match for delicate, slightly salty meats.

Sister Jane Ingalls = Beemster Gouda

OITNB_SisterJane

Walks the line between youth and hard age. Semi-firm with notes of sweet nuts and bit of tang.

Erica “Yoga” Jones = Cypress Grove Bermuda Triangle

OITNB_YogaJones

Acid ripened. Smooth, bright, and peppery in youth; softer, slightly translucent, and a little more assertive with age.

All photos of Orange is the New Black courtesy of Netflix

Amy Fukuizumi

Amy loves few things more than writing and cheese. As a testament to these loves, she drove across the country to join culture: the word on cheese. Her goal as Social Media Manager is to make the world (digitally) feel this love (and 'Like' it a lot).