Brought to you by Astrolocheese.
Did you know the zodiac pairs perfectly with cheese? Spring signs: Read your cheesy horoscope below!
PISCES
Stellar Essence:
Otherworldly, chimerical, intuitive
Cosmic Pairings:
Meredith Dairy Marinated Farmstead Sheep & Goat Cheese
- Origin: Australia
- Milk: Sheep and Goat
Accompaniments:
- Pickled Caper Berries
- Salty Black Licorice
- Gin Martini with Preserved Lemon
The two Pisces fish spin in a whirlpool of opposing emotional currents, seeking psychic symbiosis. This pairing invites you into Pisces’ cosmic tidepool by featuring salty flavors and mutable textures that evoke the sea.
Pillowy cubes of feta-style cheese bathed in olive oil frolic with bright and briny pickled caper berries, while sweet and herbal black licorice amplifies savory counterparts. A tart martini rounds out the salty-sweet combo, drawing you further into the mysteries of the deep.
ARIES
Stellar Essence:
Assertive, bold, impulsive
Cosmic Pairings:
Somerdale Red Dragon
- Origin: United Kingdom
- Milk: Cow
Accompaniments:
- Gala Apple
- Wasabi Peas
- Brown Ale
Like a charging ram, Aries leads the zodiac pack with confidence and flare. This charmingly combative fire sign is ruled by the warrior planet Mars and is out to initiate frisky food pairings with conflict as the main ingredient.
Umami cheddar studded with punchy mustard seeds, crisp wedges of Gala apple, and piquant wasabi peas, all tempered with caramelly brown ale, unleashes a flavor offensive that ignites the appetite!
TAURUS
Stellar Essence:
Sumptuous, hospitable, mellow
Cosmic Pairings:
Brie Dongé Triple Cream
- Origin: France
- Milk: Cow
Accompaniments:
- Torres Black Truffle Potato Chips
- Balsamic-Marinated Strawberries
- Champagne or Brut Sparkling Wine
Taurus is the bovine hostess with the mostest but doesn’t want to make a big fuss about it. When this congenial sign lays out a spread for guests, it is a sumptuous mélange of quiet luxury and cozy creature comforts.
Light and delicate potato chips kissed with truffle oil, a triple cream brie so rich it would make Scrooge McDuck blush, sweet-and-sour balsamic berries, and a generous Mason jar of champagne make for down-to-earth finery.
Janet Konz
Sun: Aries | Moon: Leo | Rising: Virgo Janet has been astrology-obsessed from an early age. She’s pretty sure her first search on AskJeeves.com was “aries + astrology.” Janet’s exuberance and eagerness to get into the fray is a testament to her Sun in Aries. She is an astrology-savant, musician, raconteur, esthetician, and hairdresser-extraordinaire, all of which give her ample opportunity to scrutinize everyone’s signs and make cosmic connections. She resides in Brooklyn with her vegan companion.
Alana M. Miller
Sun: Aquarius | Moon: Aquarius | Rising: Libra Alana is an avid cook, party-organizer, and archivist who not-so-secretly wants to be a cheese librarian (aka cheesemonger). With her Sun and Moon in Aquarius, she delights in creating systems and then disrupting them – perhaps this is why she sought to merge the taxonomy of cheese and mythology of the zodiac. She has published writing in Broccoli Mag, The Billfold, and the Museum of Modern Art’s Inside/Out blog. She is also co-creator and co-host of the podcast The Soak. When not compiling her own cheese card catalog, Alana enjoys spending time with her beehives, cats, and queso-obsessed husband in the San Francisco Bay Area.
